I don't want to change him

I don't want to change anyone.

I just want to find my enjoyment in the man he is.

And I guess at some point, it will either be enough or it wont be.

We love because its the only true adventure...most of us love from our need to love, not because we find someone deserving

- Nikki Giovanni

"I loved him enough...I just loved my freedom more"

- Secret Life of Bees

"Finding the truth is only half of it. It's what you do with it that matters."

- Secret Life of Bees

...She felt like a plate

Names I Like

Rasheed
Tavior

Eden


more to follow.....

Sooo, this is amazing
http://www.mothernewyork.com/?p=1942
Target Kaleidoscopic Fashion Spectacular

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
Rumi

Nothing is original. Steal from anywhere that resonates with inspiration or fuels your imagination. Devour old films, new films, music, books, paintings, photographs, poems, dreams, random conversations, architecture, bridges, street signs, trees, clouds, bodies of water, light and shadows. Select only things to steal from that speak directly to your soul. If you do this, your work (and theft) will be authentic. Authenticity is invaluable; originality is non-existent. And don’t bother concealing your thievery—celebrate it if you feel like it. In any case, always remember what Jean-Luc Godard said: ‘It’s not where you take things from—it’s where you take them to.


Jim Jarmusch

"All aboard the spontaneous express...never the less, always the more"

fly me to the moon...

So much on my mind that i cant recline, blasting holes in the night tell she bled sunshine...

breath in, enhale vapors from bright stars that shine,

breath out weed smoke retrace the skyline,

heard the bass ride out like an ancient mating call

i cant take it yall

i can hear the city breathing, chest heaving, against the flesh of the evening...

-Rodrick Sean Freeman aka Rodzilla the Blackademic (@blackademic)

See, all I want to do is be relevant

I wonder why,
I sit and cry;
Wish I could share all these tears.
I'm down and out.
I keep on moving and try to get out.

I don't know how to move on,
Where I went wrong,
Wish I could live with no fear.
So down and out,
I keep it moving and try to get out,
Some how....

Wale - Diary

May 2010

When I graduate, I promise to never bore myself with these things (currently referencing this paper I must write, on a subject I just don't find stimulating). I'm going to finish what I started, but come May 2010, its ALL ABOUT ME.

I was going to tweet this, and then I realized I wanted to write more. It's truly sad that I have to declare that I am going to live my life for myself, seeing as this is my life, and if I'm not in charge then who is? Nonetheless, I am well aware that there is no one to blame but me. Nothing at all is stopping me from getting up out of this Gelman Library, going home, packing my bags and peacing out. I have made the CHOICE to wake up every morning and participate here at GWU. Therefore, I must deal with the fact that I made this choice. So, this is not meant to be an angry rant. This is more of a friendly reminder to myself that I have chosen to spend a year doing a lot of things that I do not particularly desire to do, like research topics that I have no interest in when there are a host of books and movies and skills that I would like to read, watch and acquire. Every moment in time is a moment for us to do something. I prefer to spend those moments doing things I genuinely am thrilled to be doing, or something like, washing the dishes, that will make me happier in the end. Yes, I'd probably like to wash dishes more than I'd like to write this paper right now......

if i had it my way

...but you do, because everything is a choice. so it is always, your way.

Wonderland Arts Society = DOPE

We survive on Funk.

We at Wondaland are inventors. We wear tuxedos everyday. We jump in pools during performances. We wear Civil War hats and rock vintage Jordans. We believe truth can be broken down with the following formula: Truth= Love x Imagination.

We believe songs are spaceships. We believe music is the weapon of the future. We believe books are stars.
We believe there are only three forms of music: good music, bad music and funk.

About Wondaland:

We have created our own state, our own republic. There is grass here. Grass sprouts from toilet seats, bookshelves, ceilings and floors. Grass makes us feel good. In this state, there are no laws, there is only music. Funk rules the spirit. And punk rules the courtrooms and marketplace. Period.

In this state, there is no food. We eat books and season them with wine and cotton candy. When you want the news, you read a comic book.

There is also Love. Sex. Wisdom. Magic and Wonder. These things add up to something new and ancient that we call WISM. WISM makes us feel good. Who needs drugs when you’ve got WISM?

About Gender:

We believe women are much smarter than men. And strive to act accordingly.

About Cities:

We have built several cities. We are always looking for a new city to live in. We have recently moved from Atlantis to Metropolis, a city of our own design. It’s the largest city in the world, but you can only see it by closing your eyes.

About Technology

We are watching Steve Jobs the way Berry Gordy watched Henry Ford. We believe in Moore’s Law, in time pacing, in micro-chunking, in nanofying, in monetizing, optimizing everything, and shipping products. We’re like a cross between Guy Kawasaki and James Brown.

As we become purer channels for God's light, we develop an appetite for the sweetness that is possible in this world.
Marianne Williamson

“I used to think as I looked out on the Hollywood night- there must be thousands of girls sitting alone like me, dreaming of becoming a movie star. But I’m not going to worry about them. I’m dreaming the hardest.”\

- Mariyln Monroe

“I used to think as I looked out on the Hollywood night- there must be thousands of girls sitting alone like me, dreaming of becoming a movie star. But I’m not going to worry about them. I’m dreaming the hardest.”\

- Mariyln Monroe

SIGH.

Today, I have come to a sad realization. Sitting around waiting for a text, getting more and more anxious as time passes but my phone doesn't buzz. Anxious turns to angry. Where is the enjoyment in liking someone? I guess I get upset when I want them around and they aren't there. And now I'm just annoyed to be liking him. It was fine before when I just didn't have someone else to preoccupy my thoughts. And now I realize that I am so good at making myself not like people probably because I'm scared of feeling like this. It makes me feel crazy to want to be around someone who doesn't want to be around me. And I feel like it always happens that I want them around and they don't necessarily want to be there, or that the other way and I'm annoyed as fuck by them. When will I catch a break and be met in the middle? How do I love love so much but I cant even make it through liking someone?

Who ever taught us how to love ourselves?

How does one learn to love at all?

stop acting like you know everything

(because you dont. and of the future, you know absolutely nothing at all)

this way, life might get a chance to suprise you

and you just might enjoy it

I embrace each person that I meet, without the fear of losing them, because in my heart, I know that I am better for having met them.

This is a quote to live by.

art, adventures & the internet

art, adventures & the internet: "“ If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself but to your own estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment. „"

"Now, that love thing is a different animal. You can't see, hear or smell it. It can reach out and grab you at the supermarket, the bus stop or even during a performance. Being afraid of love and everything that goes with it, like not having complete control of your emotions and putting your heart in someone else's hands to do with it what they please. Having to pick up the pieces and try again if things go wrong. (and they do) That's scary. But, in the end not trying is worst than failing so, here we go again."

Jazmine Sullivan

People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that's holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attetion so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with your soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then they leave. And, thank God for it.

- Eat, Pray, Love

finish each day and be done with it. you have done what you could. some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. tomorrow is a new day. you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense.

- ralph waldo emerson

People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.

—Zig Ziglar

Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.

—Will Rogers

You shouldn’t let anyone make you feel bad for being you: for your thoughts, desires or actions. They are yours and you are entitled to DO YOU. You are also the recipient of the consequences of your thoughts and actions, be they good or bad. So why are you-over-there concerned?

When there is tragedy of any kind people say, “Two more. Things happen in threes.” This only perpetuates the original tragedy. When I might feel fearful of lack or limitation, were I to pray or ask God to remove the challenge, it does not work because the problem is what my attention is on and is bound to perpetuate itself. It makes no difference what the situation is, it will grow if we keep our attention on it.

To dwell on God is the door to all manifestations and expressions. We become what we contemplate. All good already IS, in consciousness. We assume that NOW is when we are what we want to be or see. Our attention is the key to life.

-April 9, 2010

But peace unlike fear doesn’t run, hide, manipulate, gossip, play games, destroy itself over and over, and play the part of a victim. Peace just knows who it is. It stands in that strength and courage, and speaks from its heart. It doesn’t have to run from anything because it is not defending anything. It stands as itself and uses tools like giving, receiving, love, unity, forgiveness, laughter, humor, patience, creativity, understanding, and silence as way of communing with God. It knows this will pass and it doesn’t have to be special or stand out, because it stands in its own worthiness and oneness with life. Peace finds its life inward; fear finds its life and its existence outward.

Only when we recognize our fantasies can we begin to see the wonders of reality
Henry Mintzberg

from the TBWA\ website

@masterwilliams

1. "Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgement." - John 7:24 26 minutes ago via Echofon
2. "Do not neglect your gift." - 1 Timothy 4:14 43 minutes ago via Echofon
3. Learn 2 look past the problem & see the problem solver! Real trust in God is above circumstances & appearances. about 1 hour ago via Echofon
4. The more u depend on God the more dependable u will find Him. (Dont just lean on Him, STAND on Him.) about 2 hours ago via Echofon
5. The best defense against mans lies is knowing Gods truth. about 3 hours ago via Echofon
6. I hope u are encouraged today fam, I am! Live the life God has 4 u & u will find perfect happiness. God Bless u. =) about 5 hours ago via Echofon
7. The person for u is not perfect, but they are perfect for u. (Be patient) about 5 hours ago via Echofon
8. Letting go can hurt, but holding onto God is as sweet as it gets. about 5 hours ago via Echofon
9. Stop changing urself 2 fit in w/ people! God made u to fit in w/ Him & that's the PERFECT fit! Somebody don't like it...they can #kickrocks! about 5 hours ago via Echofon
10. Learn to pray, be still, listen, then move. about 6 hours ago via Echofon
11. Sometimes we put ourselves in storms we could of avoided if we just would of let the Captain man the ship. about 6 hours ago via Echofon
12. Instead of asking God to take u out of ur situation, ask Him to reveal what He's trying to show u. That's when ur breakthrough will occur! about 7 hours ago via Echofon
13. Believe. If God removes it from ur life...u didn't need it. about 7 hours ago via Echofon
14. Don't waste ur time trying to hold something together that God is pulling apart. about 7 hours ago via Echofon
15. God knows what ur going thru...& He's going to bring u thru stronger than u were before. about 7 hours ago via Echofon


...i needed ALL of this today!

Facebook | Chris Masters

Hate is only a form of love which hasn't found a way to express itself logically...' Weezy."

masterwilliams

Love is sign language. It should be seen first & heard second.

The hopeful voice is the voice that says, “No,” when the world insists you stay the course. The hopeful voice has the expanded view. It sees beyond the edge of false certainty to possibility. It says, “No, this is not the course I want to go in, because I trust there is something better.”

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

-William Ernest Henley

if you wish to know the mind of a man, listen to his words

'Tell me and I'll forget; Show me and I may remember; Involve me and I'll understand.'

i like it when my days are filled with meaningful activities

frustrations :via twitter

quality over quantity please! less than 10 seconds ago via web

doing lots of things doesnt necessarily equate to accomplishing something. half a minute ago via web

I like to be busy but I dont like busy work. 1 minutes ago via web


I AM SICK OF BEING BUSY WITH LOTS OF THINGS THAT I DONT CARE ABOUT, THAT ARENT PERSONALLY FULFILLING ME, THAT I AM NOT PASSIONATE ABOUT.

time to make some changes!! But how??????????

We are all the artists of our own productions and intuition is our surest guide to the next scene.

Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed.

....and then I go on pandora and hear this song I've never heard before called 'Better Days' - GooGoo Dolls

And you asked me what I want this year
and I try to make this kind and clear
just a chance that maybe we'll find better days
'cause I don't need boxes wrapped in strings
and designer love and empty things
just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

So take these words and sing out loud
'cause everyone is forgiven now
'cause tonight's the night the world begins again

I need some place simple where we could live
and something only you can give
and that's faith and trust and peace while we're alive
and the one poor child who saved this world
and there's ten million more who probably could
if we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

So take these words and sing out loud
'cause everyone is forgiven now
'cause tonight's the night the world begins again

I wish everyone was loved tonight
and somehow stop this endless fight
just a chance that maybe we'll find better days

So take these words and sing out loud
'cause everyone is forgiven now
'cause tonight's the night the world begins again

'cause tonight's the night the world begins again

funny.

point two seconds after publishing the last post, I read this on Twitter.

B_Rog

can't please everybody. And when you can't please yourself it becomes a mess.

...what a koinkydink of relevance!

WHAT IS THE POINT!?

"Happiness is the consequence of personal effort."

So lately, I've been unbelievably busy. Late nights, not sleeping, trying to get all these things that need to be done. But what are these things that need to be done, and what/who am I doing them for? Am I doing them for the betterment of myself? What is the purpose? Me staying up cramming information for a test, is not educating myself; its simply a push to get an A. And why do I feel like I need this A? Because I have to 'make it' in the world, and I cant do that without A's? That's an awful and limiting mindset. I have come to school to learn, and quite frankly I feel like I have been doing a poor job at doing so. And all of these activities I am involved in, what can I give so that I can in turn take away something valuable and say that it was worth while spending my time on this? I want to make good use of each minute of my day. I would like to have more time to spend and talk with my family and friends. I would like a significant other. Which also reminds me of how I go about doing so. I dont even have time to go out and do things I like and in turn meet someone with similar interests. Am I looking for this person to make me happy or add to my happiness? The answer to that right now is that it cant be adding because I do not believe I am truly happy. Not that there is necessarily something wrong, but I do not feel fulfilled or invigorated by my day to day activities. I feel as if I am going through the motions. Also, how can you be too busy for love? That is just awful.

I refuse to let this life be the death of me. All this energy I am expending, I want it to be towards a purpose that I can end the day saying, I am glad I did all of those things.

"Life isnt about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."

Look. I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY. And I know that I am in charge of that. I have got to find a way to break out of this box of madness and step into the light!! But how can I just erase all thats going on and start now. I cant. I cant just quit school. I cant just denounce all of my activities, people depend on me. But is this the limiting mentality that is keeping me here? Who says I cant leave school? Who says I cant denounce my activities? Is it selfish or is it looking out for self?

So many questions....and the possibilities are endless.

“I would much rather have regrets about not doing what people said, than regretting not doing what my heart led me to and wondering what life had been like if I'd just been myself.”

-Brittany Renee

“I would much rather have regrets about not doing what people said, than regretting not doing what my heart led me to and wondering what life had been like if I'd just been myself.”

-Brittany Renee

Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it.
— Chinese Proverb.

Live your dreams and DON'T lose time explaining them. Nobody is going to understand anyway - Paulo Coelho

Like the particular person in the golf scenario, we may not be present when there is an opening for Grace in our lives. Our thoughts may lead us astray from where, when and how Grace is being called forth. If so, we may miss playing in that round of the game of life at that time on that particular day. But, the ultimate starter, God, is truly always calling our names to engage in, with and as Grace. And, we can continually call it forth as our way of living by being in constant alignment with our true nature as living expressions of God.

Grace, like our lives, is everlasting. It is, like God, inexhaustibly repeatable and unlimited – in number or by degree. There is an unending invitation to be teamed up with Grace as we head out onto any particular course of action. We just need to be willing and available to show up as an answer to its abiding call.

Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forward.

“the 10,000-hour rule trumps God-given talent in every field.” And what is that 10,000 hour-rule? Practice.

Innervisions, Feb 16

Poem #3

I gather up

each sound

you left behind

and stretch them

across our bed.

each night

I breathe you

and become high.

- Sonia Sanchez

sometimes it dawns on us slowly, despite our best efforts to ignore it

we make our own fortunes and then call them fate

and what better excuse to choose a path than to insist its our destiny

but at the end of the day we all have to live with our choices

no matter whos looking over our shoulder

- xoxo, gossip girl (312)

"Now, that love thing is a different animal. You can't see, hear or smell it. It can reach out and grab you at the supermarket, the bus stop or even during a performance. Being afraid of love and everything that goes with it, like not having complete control of your emotions and putting your heart in someone else's hands to do with it what they please. Having to pick up the pieces and try again if things go wrong. (and they do) That's scary. But, in the end not trying is worst than failing so, here we go again."

- Jazmine Sullivan

Picture it, in black and white, all the people dark and light. You may hate, you may despise, but take a look deep in those eyes.

i am feeling particularly uninspired.

and every time I think I have conquered this feeling, it creeps back again.

I want to find it and hold on to it!

No more fleeing.

something very pretty!

Enjoy

How can I hear what you say, when what you do thunders in my ears?

Ralph Waldo Emerson

no wise man ever wished to be younger

a kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.

your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own thoughts

at who's expense do we run ourselves ragged?

why do people push love away?

get off the merry-go-round and just be merry.

january 6 2010 innervisions

And the day came when the risk it took to remain tightly closed in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to bloom. This is the element of freedom.

Alicia Keys

sometimes I think it is better to go to sleep mad. The way I see it, people don't need to know the first thought that comes to your mind. You yourself may not even know where thats coming from. And you can't just take it back. Sometimes, I like a little time to think about things. Wake up in the morning and re visit things - 'why did I react this way?', 'what are my intentions saying what I'm getting ready to say?,' 'what do I want to say about how that made me feel?' etc.

four things come not back:
spoken word,
the spent arrow,
the past,
and the neglected opportunity.
- omar ibn al-halif

found this today. its funny that I would find it at this particular moment in life. if this is a message, im choosing to ignore it today.